


Grief

by AnnaDavis



Category: Saint Seiya
Genre: Angst, Dialogue Heavy, M/M, Saint Seiya Rarepair Week 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-05
Updated: 2020-10-05
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:49:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26838511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaDavis/pseuds/AnnaDavis
Summary: Mu and Kanon talk at an improper place for talking.
Relationships: Aries Mū/Gemini Kanon
Comments: 5
Kudos: 10
Collections: Saint Seiya Rarepair Week 2020





	Grief

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'd!
> 
> Posted for the Saint Seiya Rarepair Week 2020 Day 2: Grief 
> 
> Check out @StSRarepairWeek on Twitter if you want to participate!

Green eyes suddenly opened after what seemed like a long period of idleness, trying to blink the blurriness away so he could focus on his surroundings. It didn't take him long to realize that he couldn't move anything below his neck, body encased in ice, and being eaten away by the bone-chilling cold of Cocytus. 

The first thing he did once he was fully conscious again, was to try to mentally reach out for his master, who didn't seem to be anywhere as far as his eyes could see. But just like after Shion's death thirteen years ago, there was no response. He tried to scan the area with his eyes and mind to see if there was anyone else familiar, aside from Milo and Aiolia who were still unconscious next to him, trapped in the same situation. But before he could produce any desirable results, he recognized a very faint voice in the distance.

"GALAXIAN EXPLOSION!!" The characteristic sound of the explosion itself soon followed, and he could tell that the person's cosmo burst felt very similar to Saga's, but at the same time....had a slightly different edge of uniqueness to it. Just like how he remembered Saga occasionally having it, back when they were both much younger.

Even if he couldn't see it, Mu knew that the specters that had been guarding the area were all decimated then and there. And the figure was now approaching them until it finally became recognizable.

"Kanon....?" Mu asked hesitantly, almost as if he still wasn't sure of who it was.

"Mu...." Kanon trailed off, moving closer and standing in front of the three frozen gold saints.

"What are you doing here?"

"I was looking for someone...." He stared away as if he had been caught doing something he shouldn't.

"Saga...? He isn't here."

"How do you know that?"

"Because I was also looking for someone...." This time it was Mu's turn to have the same reaction as Kanon. 

The Gemini saint paused, not saying anything for a moment as he connected the dots in his brain. Shion.....Maybe if they had left him alive then they wouldn't be in that kind of situation. Well...even if he said 'they', it was really just Saga. But at this point, it was impossible not to blame himself for it too, considering that he fully encouraged it to happen.

"Mu, I'm--"

"Don't be." With Mu's firm tone, Kanon was sure that he would be placing his fingers over the Gemini saint's lips if he was able to move anything other than his head. "I know what you want to tell me, but I don't need to hear it. Your words might mean nothing in the end, so I want you to prove your feelings with your actions instead."

"I see....." Kanon sighed, checking the area once more to see if no reinforcements would be coming soon, considering that he had done noticeable damage to their numbers. Once it was deemed safe enough, he sat down on the ice, close to where he assumed Mu's feet would be. The Aries saint shivered occasionally, but Kanon knew that he wouldn't be able to get all three out of there without consequence. Even if he broke the ice, two of them were unconscious and one looked too weak to fight or even stand on his own. He found himself at a loss.

"What did you want to tell Saga, in case he was here?" The question caught Kanon off guard and he stared at Mu's eyes for a moment before answering.

"I'll be honest with you. I don't know...."

"You just wanted to see him? Make sure he was alright? Maybe even hug him and tell him how relieved you are to see him again?"

Kanon looked offended to be read so well, wondering if Mu was using his psychic abilities to invade his thoughts or what.

"How come you know so much?!"

"Oh, don't worry. It's not that I know, it's just that....." Mu closed his eyes. "I feel the same, towards my master. If he was here....and if I could move. I'd want to do all of that."

They were both starting to realize that they had more in common than previously thought. But Mu's words really made Kanon think. What did he want to say to Saga....?

Even if their relationship wasn't exactly the best, they were still brothers. More than that, they were twins. They were supposed to mean the world to each other. And they did...! At least, Saga did to Kanon. This could be their last chance, for him to tell him that he was sorry and that he wished things could be different, but....maybe he was too late, and he wouldn't have that chance at all now.

"...I loved Saga." Kanon admitted, much to Mu's surprise considering his expression and barely noticeable gasp. "I loved him more than anyone else could ever love him. All this time, I just wanted the best for him. The whole thing with....killing Athena and the Pope. I don't know why I thought it was a good idea back then. I knew that there was something up with him, and yet I still encouraged him like it was nothing. I guess I got too caught up on my ambitions."

"But Kanon...." If Mu could, he would have placed a supportive hand on his fellow gold saint's shoulder. "You haven't had it easy either. To be forgotten...locked away...Isn't that cruel? It's clear that it didn't have a good effect on you."

"No, you don't have to try to justify it for me, Mu. It was wrong, and that's the end of that. All I can do is to use the last moments of my life to try and redeem myself, in the eyes of all of you and especially the Goddess."

"I see...I really miss my master, you know. I used to constantly think things such as 'I wish I could see him again' and 'I wish I could go back in time to prevent it from happening'. But I also believe in the will of the stars. Everything happened the way it was supposed to, no matter how painful it was for everyone involved. And nothing anyone could have done would have changed the outcome. I am hoping that...that outcome will be the final victory we need, in this Holy War. Everything is different from the previous times....cloths that have never been worn before were uncovered. So if it's not us....then the bronze saints will do it. I'm leaving it in their hands." His eyes slipped closed as if he was out of energy for the time being, and he could feel Kanon leaning in closer before a cold hand caressed his cheek and pushed some hair off of his face.

The touch wasn't unwelcomed, and they stayed like that, silent for several moments until Kanon decided to speak again.

"You're a very pretty sheep, Mu."

Mu had to laugh at that, surprised and confused at the same time, slightly turning his head from one side to the other as if trying to make sense of the situation, while a faint but noticeable blush colored his cheeks at the compliment.

"What.....! Why are you saying that out of nowhere?"

Kanon glanced over at him with a hint of malice, knowing something that Mu didn't.

"It's not out of nowhere. You think I didn't notice how you looked at me back then?"

By now Mu had gone from confused to straight-up alarmed, trying to recall in his memory any time he had given Kanon any sort of 'look', unable to come up with anything.

"Wait, 'back then'?! But your existence was hidden from all of us...!"

Kanon huffed in response. "Just because it was hidden it doesn't mean that I didn't exist, Mu. I switched places with Saga sometimes and you didn't even notice." Nobody ever noticed, and while it should have brought him relief for not being found out, it just left him disappointed instead. He wanted to be his own person, not just a copy of Saga. 

In the middle of his shock, Mu decided to pause and think rationally, comparing the cosmo he was feeling from Kanon with the 'different cosmo' he remembered Saga having sometimes, and how he had always felt closer with that Saga than with the regular Saga...

"Ah....!" He exclaimed at the realization. "So it was you all along. The person who used to tell me all those nice things and encouraged me to surpass even my master...it was you, Kanon."

"Congratulations, Mu. You cracked the code." He said sarcastically, with a playful smirk in his lips as he went back to caressing Mu's face with much more confidence in his touches than before. "I wanted to make you mine, even back then."

The tone felt like it pierced through Mu's very soul, and he shivered more noticeably, though this time it wasn't only from the cold. "....Then why didn't you?" He swallowed nervously right after asking, having to be careful with his words since he couldn't exactly flee from the answer-- or from anything at all for that matter.

"Because you were too young. I wanted to wait until you were sure of your decisions. I might have been a manipulator but when it came to you, I couldn't bring myself to go too far. I knew I wasn't....the best person for you. And then I got sent to Cape Sounion and was never able to see you or Saga again." He sighed, his hand stopping as he stared into the horizon, beyond the hundreds of frozen saint remains.

"I understand.....Thanks for preserving my innocence, I suppose. All this time I thought that I might have had a crush on Saga - and then hated myself for a few years afterwards with the thought that I once liked the person who ended up killing my master. But...even if you were also technically part of it, I'm glad that it was you. Learning that Saga had been possessed made it slightly easier to cope with the loss, but hearing this is still a relief."

"It's good that you think so, but please don't hate Saga for it. I'd rather if you hated me instead." Because Kanon was yet another one who hated himself.

"Don't worry. I won't hate you, and I'm working on Saga. I wish he had been here as well, so we could talk..."

They both stayed quiet after that, with Mu's shivers becoming more noticeable as if his body got colder and colder with each passing second, even with the warmth of Kanon's cosmo nearby. Milo and Aiolia still didn't show any sign of life. Mu wondered why he was the only one to wake up. Maybe they didn't have any motivation to do so...? Maybe they had nobody to look for...? He was sure that he wouldn't have either if he wasn't so eager to see his master again. But unfortunately, he was starting to come to terms with the fact that it would only be Kanon and himself - they both would be left unfulfilled without seeing the ones they wanted to.

Kanon eventually broke the silence, clearing his throat and making Mu open his eyes again since he had closed them some time ago.

"Mu.....Do you think after the war we could...?" He made vague gestures that could mean anything at this point, hoping that Mu would have the correct interpretation.

"We could." Apparently, he did have the right one, considering that he didn't seem offended or yelled at Kanon for it. "Do you mean in our next lives?"

Kanon blinked at him, incredulously. "What, you've lost hope already? Weren't you the one talking about good outcomes just a while ago?"

"I don't know...." Mu shook his head as best as he could. "How would we even return?"

"Athena...."

"Athena..." Mu repeated. "Maybe I really lost my hope. Not on her, or the war, or the bronze saints. But on myself."

"Don't say that, Mu!" Kanon grabbed at his face since it was the only part he could reach. "I'm a saint of Athena, and I put all my trust and faith in her. That she will win the war as she had done all the previous times. And as my duty, I must have a part in ensuring her victory. You are also a saint, Aries Mu. So don't lose your hope. Soon enough you'll be unfrozen, and fighting alongside me."

Mu nearly teared up at the words, because they reminded him of all the encouragement that Saga - no, that Kanon gave him when he was still a child and barely knew anything about the world and its conflicts. But he didn't have much energy left, not even to cry. All he could do was to cling to that man's words the same way he wished he could cling to his body.

"I never thought I'd say that but....thank you, Kanon." He gave his best shaky smile, trying his hardest to be hopeful. Maybe Kanon was right and in the future, they really could...

"Of course. No need to thank me." Kanon gave him a genuine smile in return. In a bold move, he started leaning in and closing the distance between them, but before their lips could touch they were interrupted by voices not previously present.

"Over there, get him!"

Kanon stood back up in a flash, shooting Mu a painful look so brief that it was almost imperceptible, before smiling down at him again.

"I'll see you soon, Mu. Stay strong until then, and don't let me down!"

"Yes, Kanon. Don't worry about that."

And just like that, Kanon quickly moved away to fight the rest of the specters that were after him, while Mu's green eyes slipped closed once again, allowing himself to fade back into unconsciousness.


End file.
